Monday, August 31, 2009

26 Days

26 days 'til my due date. I can't wait. Every week I feel noticeably huger than the previous week. Today as I was sitting at work, my back was tired the whole day. I know lots of women have bad back pain during pregnancy, and I should count my blessings that I haven't had any up until now, but boy, was it exhausting. It's 8:10 right now, and I really, really want to go to bed.

I think I am going to top 200 lbs by the end of this. I can't even express how much this depresses me. After everything I did a few years ago to lose weight I had carried around my whole life, here I am bigger than I ever imagined I could ever be. The thought of having to do it again, eat salad for lunch every damned day for a year again, makes me want to cry.

Anyway, I went to the doctor today. Since I am now in my 37th week, she checked my cervix. Apparently it is softening, is halfway thinned, and 1 cm dilated. When I asked what this meant, she said it reduces the chance that I will be late, but does not by any means eliminate that chance. She says most first babies are late, so I should plan for that, and that way if he comes early, I will be pleasantly surprised. SIGH.


Beth said...

Ayyy, that last month is the pits.

Breastfeeding, if that works for you, REALLY helps the weight come off. Pretty fast, looking back, though not fast enough when you're in the thick of it (sorry, bad pun). :D

I know a lot of people (myself included) whose first one came early and subsequent didn't. Fingers crossed you get a nice, plump 38-weeker. ;)

Take care and keep us posted!!

Nancy Corbato said...

The last month of pregnancy is so horrible that women will do absolutely anything to get that baby out of them. Back pain is horrible --my first had his head pressed against my sciatic nerve and it was excruciating during contractions. However, my cervix didn't open 1 cm until I'd been in early labor for a day and a half, so I think you're going to be early . . .

Don't let the numbers on the scale bum you out too much. After all, that's the total for two entire people! You'll lose some of the weight before you even leave the hospital --though you do need to keep wearing maternity clothes for a while. (A friend's husband brought her regular clothes to wear home from the hospital, and reduced her to tears.) Breast feeding does help, and just being able to move around normally again helps.

Best wishes!

The Beast Mom said...

Hang in there - you're almost to the end. :) I agree w/ the other commenters that a bunch of weight does come off w/ feeding and even at the hosp. At least the bulk of the fluid related wt comes off pretty much automatically. :)

And yes, the maternity clothes are needed for a little while afterwards. That was something I hadn't seriously anticipated. I despised all my huge maternity clothes by the end of pregnancy. They were the last things I wanted to wear once the baby was out! But such is reality afterwards.

I hope your day is more physically tolerable today. It's really hard when you can't find relief w/ the usual ways of stretching out, standing up, etc. That was one thing that really put me to tears at times. I felt like I just couldn't EVER escape the phys discomfort at the end, not even momentarily. By the end, I avoided all the women around me who kept feeling compelled to say, "Pregnancy made me feel better than I ever had! I positively glowed!" I wanted to punch them all. ;) Sometimes a pregnant woman just needs a little sympathy and the freedom to complain. After all, for many of us, pregnancy is very hard on the body and mind.


Anonymous said...

I feel for you, woman. But hang in there. I don't think you'll be late either. The weight will come off = with Evelyn I weighed 198 at the end.