My sweetheart sent me some gorgeous flowers yesterday.
Why yesterday? Because, you see, he hates Valentine's Day. It's a commercial Hallmark holiday, and it bugs him.
So he sent me flowers yesterday, as an un-Valentine's Day present. His way of being contrary without being contrary, I guess.
I was completely surprised. I didn't expect anything, since I know how he feels about the day. He caught me off guard completely.
I love them. I love him.
It got me thinking about Valentine's Day, though. My sweetie is not the first man I've dated who hates Valentine's Day. I attract (and am attracted to) rebels, maybe. I'd never really had an opinion about Valentine's Day--if anything, I used to think it was kind of silly. People (stereotypically women) do seem to get a little crazy about it, demanding wild proofs of love and expensive presents, and I do think that's stupid. I'd rather have a man who supports and loves me every day, rather than someone who gives me fancy presents once a year.
That said, the first time I dated someone who couldn't stop complaining about Valentine's Day, I started to get annoyed. I don't ask for a lot: a bunch of flowers, a kiss, and a tender moment. What's the big deal? I've read a lot of rants today in blogland about how stupid Valentine's Day is, how it's designed to value the superficial over the substantial. But I resent the idea that if I like to receive or give a present on the day, my relationship is founded on sand. It's not an either/or proposition.
To me, Valentine's Day is like Mother's Day. Mother's Day is another made up Hallmark holiday, complete with flowers that cost five times as much as any other day, and jacked-up Mother's Day menus in restaurants. But you can bet I don't call my mom for weeks prior to the day, telling her to expect nothing from me, because it's a stupid holiday, and I show her that I love her on all other days so she doesn't need anything special from me. A card, a phone call on the day: it's so little effort to put a smile on the face of someone you love. What's the problem with this?
All the ranting about Valentine's Day is as childish as the romantic adolescent paroxysms those rants are protesting, a kind of "I won't, and you can't make me." Get a grip: Valentine's Day is what you make it.
My sweetheart made it February 13th. Meanwhile, I bought him something for no reason, just because I thought he'd want it--and called it a Valentine's present to annoy him :-).